As Watermarke Church has grown, the number of people with ideas and suggestions has grown, too. Every leader is going to deal with criticism, but often leaders find themselves dismissing some critics, only listening to a select few. The few are typically saying what you want to hear. That is a dangerous position to take as a leader. Although it's natural to listen to people who say what you want to hear, it insulates you from some people or ideas that will make you a better leader.
Here is how I handle EVERY critique we get at Watermarke:
1. Give grace
2. Consider the source
3. Discern the heart behind the feedback
4. Is this person engaged in the mission and do they understand the strategy
5. Listen
6. Give grace
7. Thank them
If the critique is good, then let them know. If it is poor, then give them grace. If it's rooted in frustration, there's a good chance people do not understand your mission or strategy/approach.
We always must consider the source, too. Negative feedback from your target consumer is much more important than feedback from the sidelines. Feedback from those invested in the mission will carry more weight than criticism from people casting stones from the bleachers.
The better job we do communicating mission, vision, and strategy, the better the feedback, and the fewer people we have criticizing out of ignorance. And, with a well defined strategy and approach, hyper-critical people tend to drift away. Every time I make it clear where Watermarke Church is going, the people who are on mission buy in further, and those with their own agendas tend to start looking for other organization to infuse their personal vision. That's a win.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Leadership Lessons I've Learned, Number 5
5. Be decisive
I remember hearing Andy Stanley teach on leadership decisions. One thing I specifically remember him saying was, “with most decisions, you’ll basically only have 80% of the information you think you need to make the decision.” That’s true. But when it comes to decisions, we can be out of balance in two ways:
1. Paralysis by analysis: Great leaders seek wise counsel, but we have to be careful to not get stuck in the information gathering side of a decision without progressing towards the decision. In my experience of taking leadership of a church in need of drastic change, I had to be careful to gather good information from wise counsel, but in the end, I had to make a decision with some information gaps. Honestly, I could still be looking for information on every decision that I have made – and I would be that much closer to paralysis.
2. Lack of analysis: I take it seriously that the wisest person to ever walk the face of the earth sought wise counsel. If Solomon needed it, I’m thinking I do, as well. The hard part with counsel is knowing who to invite into the conversation. My challenge has been to find people who understand the vision and strategy and come to the table without personal agendas. These people may be harder to find, but the payoff is worth the search.
In the end, as a leader, we are called to move people from where we are to where we could or should be. And that takes decisions. At Watermarke Church, I’ve had some really tough ones to make, but every time, though prayer and wise counsel and decisiveness, our church and core leadership have appreciated us making the tough decision.
Be patient when you don't know the answer, but remember that indecisiveness is not a great leadership quality. Leaders can afford to not know an immediate answer, but leaders cannot be unclear about the vision.
I remember hearing Andy Stanley teach on leadership decisions. One thing I specifically remember him saying was, “with most decisions, you’ll basically only have 80% of the information you think you need to make the decision.” That’s true. But when it comes to decisions, we can be out of balance in two ways:
1. Paralysis by analysis: Great leaders seek wise counsel, but we have to be careful to not get stuck in the information gathering side of a decision without progressing towards the decision. In my experience of taking leadership of a church in need of drastic change, I had to be careful to gather good information from wise counsel, but in the end, I had to make a decision with some information gaps. Honestly, I could still be looking for information on every decision that I have made – and I would be that much closer to paralysis.
2. Lack of analysis: I take it seriously that the wisest person to ever walk the face of the earth sought wise counsel. If Solomon needed it, I’m thinking I do, as well. The hard part with counsel is knowing who to invite into the conversation. My challenge has been to find people who understand the vision and strategy and come to the table without personal agendas. These people may be harder to find, but the payoff is worth the search.
In the end, as a leader, we are called to move people from where we are to where we could or should be. And that takes decisions. At Watermarke Church, I’ve had some really tough ones to make, but every time, though prayer and wise counsel and decisiveness, our church and core leadership have appreciated us making the tough decision.
Be patient when you don't know the answer, but remember that indecisiveness is not a great leadership quality. Leaders can afford to not know an immediate answer, but leaders cannot be unclear about the vision.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Leadership Lessons I've Learned, Number 4
4. Always lead with honesty and transparency
I am a huge believer in honesty. Of course, as a pastor (and a Jesus-follower), this should be the case. Nothing new here. Unfortunately, my experience in the world of church has proven this is not always the case. Too many pastors lead under a vale of lies and dishonesty. To many pastors say one thing from the pulpit and another behind closed doors.
While this may be the most basic thing I've learned, it is also one of the most important. At Watermarke, I have not so much learned this (a.k.a. we have not lied a bunch and been burned), but rather been reminded of how important it is for leaders to be open and honest with those we lead.
Here's a simple example of how this worked for us at Watermarke:
This summer, we were in the middle of a fund-raising effort to move into a new facility that would provide a multitude of blessings for our church. As a pretty new leader in our church, I had build some trust and relational capital, but the people of Watermarke had been burned by previous leadership before with similar campaigns.
As our funding deadline approached, it was clear that we were not going to receive the monetary gifts necessary to make our much-anticipated move. As a leader, I felt like I had failed with casting vision, making appropriates asks, etc. And, as the leader who initiated this campaign, the last thing I wanted to do was stand up in front of our church body and announce we would NOT be making the move. The thought was gut wrenching. But I knew that was my only option. God had been very loud and clear, in that His timing was not lining up with mine (always a frustrating lesson to learn). So, on Sunday, June 28th, I stood in front of our church and delivered a message on patience. The bottom line for the message was, "We limit God's power when we become impatient with His timing." That was a very tough message to deliver. I've never been so exhausted after a Sunday morning in my life!
Funny thing, that was maybe the best message I delivered all of 2009 (I only spoke a dozen times, but still). Our church really rallied around our honesty, integrity, and leadership as we announced our decision to be patient and delay our move. Why? I think because people love leaders that can make tough decisions while remaining honest and transparent.
As leaders, we must live what we teach, and we must be honest and transparent with those who follow. We are all forced to make difficult decisions, and through each one, we must be honest and transparent.
Are you being honest in your leadership? Are you walking your talk? Do say one think in public and another in private? Are you living contrary to what God's Word teaches? God cannot bless what's not blessible, and God can do a lot through us and our honesty.
I am a huge believer in honesty. Of course, as a pastor (and a Jesus-follower), this should be the case. Nothing new here. Unfortunately, my experience in the world of church has proven this is not always the case. Too many pastors lead under a vale of lies and dishonesty. To many pastors say one thing from the pulpit and another behind closed doors.
While this may be the most basic thing I've learned, it is also one of the most important. At Watermarke, I have not so much learned this (a.k.a. we have not lied a bunch and been burned), but rather been reminded of how important it is for leaders to be open and honest with those we lead.
Here's a simple example of how this worked for us at Watermarke:
This summer, we were in the middle of a fund-raising effort to move into a new facility that would provide a multitude of blessings for our church. As a pretty new leader in our church, I had build some trust and relational capital, but the people of Watermarke had been burned by previous leadership before with similar campaigns.
As our funding deadline approached, it was clear that we were not going to receive the monetary gifts necessary to make our much-anticipated move. As a leader, I felt like I had failed with casting vision, making appropriates asks, etc. And, as the leader who initiated this campaign, the last thing I wanted to do was stand up in front of our church body and announce we would NOT be making the move. The thought was gut wrenching. But I knew that was my only option. God had been very loud and clear, in that His timing was not lining up with mine (always a frustrating lesson to learn). So, on Sunday, June 28th, I stood in front of our church and delivered a message on patience. The bottom line for the message was, "We limit God's power when we become impatient with His timing." That was a very tough message to deliver. I've never been so exhausted after a Sunday morning in my life!
Funny thing, that was maybe the best message I delivered all of 2009 (I only spoke a dozen times, but still). Our church really rallied around our honesty, integrity, and leadership as we announced our decision to be patient and delay our move. Why? I think because people love leaders that can make tough decisions while remaining honest and transparent.
As leaders, we must live what we teach, and we must be honest and transparent with those who follow. We are all forced to make difficult decisions, and through each one, we must be honest and transparent.
Are you being honest in your leadership? Are you walking your talk? Do say one think in public and another in private? Are you living contrary to what God's Word teaches? God cannot bless what's not blessible, and God can do a lot through us and our honesty.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Leadership Lessons I've Learned, Number 3
3. Develop People and Your Team
I am addicted to progress. If you have been around me for any length of time, you've probably noticed this trait. It is something in me that can be both helpful and harmful. I love starting and launching new things, I hate maintaining old things, and I am more task/project focused than people focused.
One thing (of many) that I have learned in my first year as a Lead Pastor is making progress WHILE developing people and teams. Here's the catch for me: In most cases, it's easier just to do it myself or to spoon-feed answers and not teach or train others. If I am too progress or task focused, which is my natural bent, I am always going to use people as a means to my end. I am going to delegate tasks and answer questions for the purpose of task accomplishment. And believe me, we'll get the job done, but where does that leave the people who look at me as their leader?
Answer: it leaves them no better off than when we started the project or task. I could easily make the argument it leaves people worse than before the project. As a leader, one of my primary roles must be the development of our staff and leadership teams. I am responsible for their development. The bad news is I'm not smart enough to teach all that may need to be taught - good news is I do not necessarily need to be the person developing them all the time. As a leaders, though, I need to help the people around me identity opportunities to grow and develop and support their pursuit of learning. At times, I'll be the one teaching, but more often than not, these learning opportunities come from outside our staff and/or church.
In the end, teaching and training others does more to advance our mission than me using people to get a job done. For me, this is a classic urgent versus important paradigm. When I focus on the urgent, I get too task oriented and ignore the people around me. As a leader, it is MORE important for me to consistently help our staff learn and grow than to launch and lead new stuff on my own. Teaching others to lead and think like a leader pays much larger dividends for me, them, and our organization.
Maybe for you this is common sense, but for me, it is something I need to be reminded of often. How much time are you spending developing those around you?
I am addicted to progress. If you have been around me for any length of time, you've probably noticed this trait. It is something in me that can be both helpful and harmful. I love starting and launching new things, I hate maintaining old things, and I am more task/project focused than people focused.
One thing (of many) that I have learned in my first year as a Lead Pastor is making progress WHILE developing people and teams. Here's the catch for me: In most cases, it's easier just to do it myself or to spoon-feed answers and not teach or train others. If I am too progress or task focused, which is my natural bent, I am always going to use people as a means to my end. I am going to delegate tasks and answer questions for the purpose of task accomplishment. And believe me, we'll get the job done, but where does that leave the people who look at me as their leader?
Answer: it leaves them no better off than when we started the project or task. I could easily make the argument it leaves people worse than before the project. As a leader, one of my primary roles must be the development of our staff and leadership teams. I am responsible for their development. The bad news is I'm not smart enough to teach all that may need to be taught - good news is I do not necessarily need to be the person developing them all the time. As a leaders, though, I need to help the people around me identity opportunities to grow and develop and support their pursuit of learning. At times, I'll be the one teaching, but more often than not, these learning opportunities come from outside our staff and/or church.
In the end, teaching and training others does more to advance our mission than me using people to get a job done. For me, this is a classic urgent versus important paradigm. When I focus on the urgent, I get too task oriented and ignore the people around me. As a leader, it is MORE important for me to consistently help our staff learn and grow than to launch and lead new stuff on my own. Teaching others to lead and think like a leader pays much larger dividends for me, them, and our organization.
Maybe for you this is common sense, but for me, it is something I need to be reminded of often. How much time are you spending developing those around you?
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